I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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