He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
