Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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