You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize