I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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