Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
