So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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