We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
