Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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