he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
