So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
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