.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
sex in a hospital.. check
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize