i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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