I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
