Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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