Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Randomize