oh god the rape fog is back!
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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