you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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