"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
