Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Damn victory sex feels great
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
