we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
