Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
