:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
