im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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