guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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