this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
COCAINE IS GR8
its liver damage thursday
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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