It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
