he wants to bone in the snuggie
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize