Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I am naked and annoyed.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize