They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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