just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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