im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
