I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
