No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
