it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
