sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
