Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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