You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Randomize
