I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize