Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
