ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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