Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
