a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
