lets start a swedish sibling band together
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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