It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize