If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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