Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
