Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
