Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
