it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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