im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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